From the missing persons desk

Its been six weeks and there's STILL no sign of the little old lady who was harassed into signing the recall petition! I hope she's alright. For that matter, there's no sign of the five OTHER people who were reportedly forced to sign aginst their will by a pack of desperate, wild-eyed petitioners. No calls, no complaints, nothing. You'd think one of 'em would have said something by now, wouldn't you? Instead, the poor souls just vanished! Sounds very sinister to me. Everybody please check on your neighbors. I mean, nobody would invent a crazy story like this, right?

Right?